My son … he loves cricket … so he tried out for the team.
It's a sport that he holds ... in the highest esteem.
It wasn't too long ... before he was heard to exclaim,
"I made it … I'm in ... I must prepare for the game."
The preparations were not ... to go and get fit,
What he meant was it's time … to buy the priciest kit.
Then once he was batted and padded … boxed and the like,
You would think he was ready … but NO … there was one final strike.
"But Mum" … he cajoled … "I want to make a big score",
"And that will be hard … when my eyesight is poor."
"What I need are some lenses … the contacty type,"
"If I have some real soon … then I won't need to gripe."
So he made an appointment … you can do that online,
And before I could blink … he had a day and a time.
I could feel my poor purse ... getting lighter and lighter,
But he couldn't care less … the self centred blighter.
Then I warned him … quite gently … that despite his confident air,
That contacts were tricky … and must be handled with care.
He pooh poohed my concerns … "Mum it'll all be alright"
"I'll pop them in for the game and improve my eyesight."
"I only will wear them ... for sport … you will see,"
"I can handle these things … it will be easy for me."
So we arrived ... at the Optical Shop … right on cue,
And listened intently ... to the lady who knew.
How to put in those contacts … and how to take them back out,
How to wash them … and store them … she left us no doubt.
Then it was time … to make the transfer,
And that's when the phenomenon ... began to occur.
He held that small disc ... and he looked at his eye.
Then he blindly pushed on … and gave it a try.
At that point … he paused … he was suddenly clammy,
His heart it was racing … a big double whammy.
His face it went pale … with a grayish, green tinge,
Sweat formed on his brow … and he started to cringe.
He put down the contact … and made a quick plea,
"I really must sit … I'm weak at the knee."
"I'm feeling all dizzy … my innards are churning."
It was very dramatic … and somewhat concerning.
And so we discovered … despite his confident air,
That touching his eyeball … is something he just cannot bear.
Now the hard lesson to learn ... was don't be such a "know-all"
But as a typical teenager … he probably learnt nothing at all.